sunday scribbling: brave

#193 - Brave

This week the prompt is: brave. Write about it, but also be brave in your writing. Push yourself. Go on, you can do it!

I'm working on my bravery. I don't know what happened but I used to be very brave. I wasn't afraid of anything. Now, I am. I think it has to do with growing up, leaving my adolescence and that psychological thinking that nothing will hurt me.
For example, (a silly example) I went sledding last night. It was a blast but I took a pretty rough spill, several in fact, but one rough one in particular. It hurt, badly. I went over a jump and landed on my left side. It was one of those times where your head snaps and you slam it into the ground along with your shoulder. My elbow dug into my rib cage and knocked the wind out of me. Oh it hurt, but of course I "walked it off." Today I have a headache and I can't turn my head all the way to the right. Great. Truth be told I was a little shaken, and all I wanted to do was go home and take aspirin and lie down. And I had a headache. I'm all about "getting back on the horse," but usually a little later. Not wanting to rain on my friends' parade, I kept going the rest of the night. I had a few other minor spills, one where my face was dragged on the snow and I have a sweet "snow burn" (think of a rug or floor burn) on my face. Nine of us went down the hill on a surfboard. It was AWESOME. Scary, but so fun. And we biffed it three or four times before we got it right. It's not that I don't like to have fun, it's just scary. I've never broken anything, and I'd like to keep it that way. I also have a track record of getting hurt around finals week and I'd rather not add to that list, thank you.
But in all seriousness, I'm learning to be brave accepting adulthood, real life, yadda yadda. It's scary and a lot of times I just want to pretend it's not happening, but that of course gets me no where. And in all seriousness, it's really quite exciting. I'm grateful for my program director, Dr. Nyland, who has such great perspective. We had our last day of class, internship prep. class, on Thursday and of course it was a free-for-all asking questions about anything relating to internships. Now of course I'm freaking out, panicking, scared out of my mind, and excited to no end. Dr. Nyland made a good point though; that being that this internship is only 1 year of my life and if I don't get in where I want to, or get in at all, it's ok. It's a blip and it's not the end of the world. Really I was just grateful that she pointed out that it was only 1 year of our life, the internship that is, because I'm scared I won't get in to any of the Boston internships I'm applying to and then the world will end and I'll never go anywhere as good, and then I'll never be a dietitian and so on. Silly. So thanks Dr. Nyland. I'm ok now and I'm practicing being brave. Life's an adventure afterall, right?

"The bravest are surely those who have the clearest vision of what is before them, glory and danger alike, and yet notwithstanding, go out to meet it."-Thucydides

Ok. Bring it on. I like a good challenge :)